hiM

I can't stop thinking about hiM.

We had French last period yesterday and we were supposed to be doing a practice French listening test, but hE was sat in front of me. I couldn't concentrate on the test. I just kept on imagining us together.

It's pathetic though. I can dream all I want but hE'll never look at me the way I look at hiM. Well not for real anyway.

I tried to distance myself from hiM because I knew hE would hurt me if I got too close.

You see, I'm not exactly the coolest girl in my year - heck, I'm probably the lamest... which is why hE pretends to look at me that way. Like hE thinks I'm attractive. It's a joke, somthing to make hiM seem funnier in front of hiS friends.

But the thing is even though I know hE's kidding around, I can't seem to turn myself away.

hiS half smiles and fake glances just make me more attracted to hiM. And then when hE ignores me it makes me more desperate for hiM to acknowledge me. I crave for a smile, a word, even just for hiM to look at me so I can lose myself in hiS dark blue eyes.

Reading this over, I know it sounds lame but it's the truth.

I shouldn't keep doing this to myself. Dreaming of something that will never be. I should try to forget him...shouldn't I?